It’s Really Very Simple, and Other Lies


There are some sentences I can’t see or hear without going cold all over. They include:

‘It’s really very simple.’

‘If I can do it, anyone can.’

‘Don’t worry, I’m no technophile either.’

‘Just follow the instructions and you’ll be fine.’

And, worst of all: ‘Any fool can do it.’ (Sometimes followed helpfully by ‘Even you.’)

No idea why this should happen, but if I hear any of the above I can almost guarantee that I’m about to prove that person wrong. Which isn’t all that satisfying: we all like to be special, but not at the price of being told ‘Well, nobody else has had any trouble with it.’

Instructions for anything to do with computers are surely the worst. They always start very promisingly, but by point 2 or 3 there will always be something along the lines of ‘Just link to your gobbledegook, then simply obtain your Da Vinci code and paste it into your magic window’ – sometimes accompanied by a helpful video clip showing a screen that looks nothing like mine.

But I’m sure it’s all really very simple …






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